Luke 6:47-49 (NKJV) “Whoever comes to Me, and hears My sayings and does them, I will show you whom he is like: He is like a man building a house, who dug deep and laid the foundation on the rock. And when the flood arose, the stream beat vehemently against that house, and could not shake it, for it was founded on the rock. But he who heard and did nothing is like a man who built a house on the earth without a foundation, against which the stream beat vehemently; and immediately it fell. And the ruin of that house was great.”
When a couple gets married, both leave their parents and are cleaved together as one flesh. One flesh means being stuck together physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Because they have established their marriage as a covenant instead of a contract, they will face every trial, tribulation, and test together, and journey with each other till death do they part.
They will have a vision for their marriage, such as having one to two children in the first five years. However, they also need to agree upon who would stay home to look after the children during the formative years of their lives. They should also have a joint bank account and place all their assets in both names since they have taken the view that marriage is a covenant where all resources are shared between two parties.
The couple should expect necessary adjustments at different stages of the marriage. They need to discuss and clarify their expectations of the roles and responsibilities of a husband, wife, father, and mother, and manage their expectations accordingly. For a marriage to work, the couple will need to continually extend grace to and help each other. It is much easier to do so when the marriage is based on Agape love, which is unconditional, so that they will not demand rights, and privileges, or have conditions and escape clauses. This way, they will have the maturity to work out differences even if there is a period of disenchantment. The constant and conscientious practice of each other’s love languages will ensure that both parties’ emotional reservoirs are full. Seeing parents express love to each other will also help their children to be emotionally and psychologically healthy.
Because money is one of the most contentious topics in a marriage, it is wise to have a frank and open discussion about finances as early as possible so that the couple is aware of each other’s spending habits, lifestyles, and the differences between a man’s and a woman’s expenses.
When a couple is of one flesh, they will be of one heart to worship God, strive to have the same theological conviction, and live their lives based on the teachings of the Bible. Establishing a marriage as a covenant is what gives it a strong foundation that will withstand testing when difficulties come.
Sermon Series：Before You Say I Do (Lesson 11 Finances)
婚姻的稳固基石
路加福音6:47-49 凡到我这里来，听见我的话就去行的，我要告诉你们他像什么人：他像一个人盖房子，深深地挖地，把根基安在磐石上。到发大水的时候，水冲那房子，房子总不能摇动。因为根基立在磐石上。有古卷作因为盖造得好。惟有听见不去行的，就像一个人在土地上盖房子，没有根基。水一冲，随即倒塌了，并且那房子坏得很大。
当一对情侣结婚后，两个人便脱离了各自的父母而组成新的一体。所谓一体指的是两人在身体，情感和精神上紧密结合在一起。因为他们已经将婚姻立为盟约而非契约，他们将会共同面对所有的试炼、患难，一起经受考验，结伴同行直到死亡将他们分开。
两人会对他们的婚姻有一个展望，例如在结婚后的前五年有一个到两个孩子。然而他们也需要对于由谁留在家中在孩子们的成长期间提供照顾达成共识。既然夫妇双方已达成共识，视婚姻为一切资源由双方共享的盟约，夫妻俩也应该开设一个联名账户并且将所有的资产都放在双方的名下。
夫妻俩应该预见到在婚姻的不同阶段需要做出必要的调整。他们需要讨论并澄清双方对于丈夫、妻子、父亲、和母亲的角色和责任的期望，并据此管理这些期望。一桩成功的婚姻里，夫妻二人需要一如既往地恩赐相待，相互扶持。当两人的关系是建立在无条件的爱的基础上时，做到这些就容易多了，这样他们就不会主张权利或特权，或提出条件和免责条款。这样即使会有一段时间的分歧，他们最终也会成熟地解决婚姻中的分歧。不断认真地操练彼此的爱的语言，将确保双方的情感储备都丰沛盈满。目睹父母的恩爱也可以促进孩子们的身心健康。
因为金钱是在婚姻中最有争议的话题之一，因此最有效的办法便是夫妻二人及早就财务问题进行开诚布公的讨论，好教他们对彼此的消费习惯，生活方式有所了解。 并且了解男人和女人在消费方面的不同。
当一对情侣成为一体后，他们便会同心的敬拜神，追求一致的神学信念，并按照圣经的教导来生活。将婚姻立为盟约将使其拥有一个稳固的基石，当患难来袭，就能经受住考验。
讲章系列：步向红毯之前（第11章 财务）
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