Ephesians 5:18-21 (NKJV) And do not be drunk with wine, in which is dissipation; but be filled with the Spirit, speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord, giving thanks always for all things to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, submitting to one another in the fear of God.
In a marriage, there will be many opportunities for us to be upset, hurt, criticised or irritated over small issues. We need to learn how to handle these situations. We can either allow these things to upset us, have our peace and joy stolen, or draw strength from the Lord while waiting for our spouse to change. Some people might drown their unhappiness with alcohol, which can lead to other evils.
The Apostle Paul tells us that we can draw strength from the Lord by being filled with the Holy Spirit because it strengthens and edifies our spirit man. Once our spirit man is strengthened and edified, we will have the ability to keep walking in love and forgiveness. The law of sin and death will attempt to enslave the flesh to start a conflict and make us dwell in it. However, we shouldn’t feed the flesh or the carnal nature, but yield to the Holy Spirit. We are to worship God through praise and worship, and choose to thank the Lord for everything.
1 Corinthians 14:4 (NKJV) He who speaks in a tongue edifies himself, but he who prophesies edifies the church.
This edification is akin to recharging a depleted battery, granting it renewed energy. When we choose to walk in love and forgiveness, we are giving out of the spirit man. When we are emotionally drained, we become easily irritated and will succumb to the flesh. However, there is a renewed strength and grace within us when we are edified and filled with the Holy Spirit. It is much easier to walk in the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus when our spirit man is strengthened. The devil attempts to kill, steal, and destroy individuals and their marriages by causing them to feed on the flesh. The flesh then dictates our emotions, causing us to become offended, hurt, angry, and vindictive with our words and actions. When we cool down from heated arguments, we usually regret many of these actions. We can better control our emotions and the flesh when filled with the Spirit because the spirit man will yield to the Holy Spirit more easily when it is strong and edified.
The key to maintaining peace, love, and joy in a marriage is for the couple to have their own worship, devotion, and prayer time in the Spirit. God will work with us during these sessions because of the presence of the Holy Spirit and the confrontation of the Word of God, enabling us to choose to extend grace and mercy towards our spouse. That’s why we are closer to each other when we draw closer to God each day.
Sermon Series: Blessed Wives, Blessed Lives
更亲近神，更亲近彼此
以弗所书 5:18-21 不要醉酒，酒能使人放荡；乃要被圣灵充满。 当用诗章、颂词、灵歌彼此对说，口唱心和地赞美主。凡事要奉我们主耶稣基督的名常常感谢父神。又当存敬畏基督的心，彼此顺服。
在婚姻中，我们会遇到许多机会让自己感到不悦、受伤、被批评，或者因一些小事而心生烦躁。我们需要学习如何面对这些情况。我们可以选择让这些事影响我们，使我们的平安和喜乐被夺去，也可以选择在等候配偶改变的过程中，从主那里支取力量。有些人可能会用酒精来麻醉自己的不快乐，但这只会带来更多的罪恶和问题。
使徒保罗告诉我们，我们可以通过被圣灵充满，从主那里支取力量，因为这会坚固并建立我们的内在灵人。当内在灵人被坚固和建立时，我们就有能力持续行在爱与饶恕之中。罪和死的律会试图奴役肉体，驱使它挑起冲突，并使我们被困其中。然而，我们不应当喂养肉体和属血气的性情，而是要顺服圣灵。我们要借着赞美和敬拜来敬拜神，并选择为一切事感谢主。
哥林多前书 14:4说方言的是造就自己，做先知讲道的乃是造就教会。
这种造就是好比给耗尽电力的电池重新充电，使它重新得力。当我们选择行在爱与饶恕中时，我们就是在从内在灵人中支取并付出。然而，当我们的情感被耗尽时，我们就会变得容易烦躁，并且很快就会顺着肉体而行。然而，当我们被圣灵充满、得着建造时，里面就有一种更新的力量与恩典。这使我们更容易活在基督耶稣里那赐生命之灵的律中，因为此时我们的灵人得以刚强。
魔鬼企图通过让人喂养肉体来杀害、偷窃和毁坏个人以及他们的婚姻。肉体会支配我们的情绪，使我们被冒犯、受伤、愤怒，并在言语和行为上变得报复。当争吵过后冷静下来时，我们往往会后悔其中许多的行为。当我们被圣灵充满时，就能更好地管理情绪和肉体，因为灵人刚强时，就更容易顺服圣灵。
维持婚姻中平安、爱与喜乐的关键，是夫妻双方都要有自己单独的敬拜、灵修和在灵里的祷告时间。在这些时刻，因着圣灵的同在与神话语的提醒，神会在我们心中动工，使我们能够选择向配偶施恩与怜悯。这就是为什么，当我们每天更亲近神时，我们彼此之间也会更加亲近。
讲章系列：蒙福的妻子，蒙福的人生
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