Proverbs 22:6 (NKJV) Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.
If we look at different passages of the Bible, God has expectations of the father. One key leadership role of a man in the house is to ensure that he manages his family well. This means teaching and guiding his children to be respectful and well-mannered in both speech and actions (1 Timothy 3:3-5).
The discipline, instruction, and training of the children do not rest on the responsibilities of their church teachers. The primary responsibility of ensuring the children are taught the ways of the Lord lies with the father, who is the spiritual head of the household, with the mother being the partner in this ministry.
Firstly, God did not ask us to teach them a religion. They will grow tired of a religion filled with rituals and legalism, and when they get older, they will be lured away by the world if their relationship with God is merely a form of religiosity. Christianity is not a religion but a relationship with God, which begins with accepting Jesus Christ as their Lord and Saviour. Thereafter, it is essential to teach them the importance of attending church on Sundays to worship as a corporate body of believers and listening to the preaching of the Word, making it a priority in their lives.
Secondly, we need to model for them the importance of spending quiet time with God on their own. Before they are six years old, we can model for them by reading the Bible to them before bedtime. When they can read, we can ask them to read passages from the children’s Bible. Thereafter, we can ask them what they would like to pray about, for friends, classmates, family members, and for themselves. This way, we can teach them how to pray and witness God answering their prayer. It teaches them faith and dependence on God, casting our cares upon Him, because He cares for us. Over time, it will develop into a relationship with God. Once this close bond is established with God and with their parents, there is nothing that they won’t share with them when they are at different stages of their lives, because it has developed into a lifestyle.
Thirdly, we need to teach them to understand God through the Bible, which acts as our measure for values. We should teach deeper Christian principles as they grow older, focusing on what is non-negotiable for believers and what we stand for as Christians. We should encourage them to read up on what the Bible says about topics that are being taught at school. It will also promote understanding of the differences between biblical teachings and the values promoted in the world.
Lastly, we must remember that rules without the foundation of unconditional love and effective communication will cause our children to become defiant. Our children will only listen, obey, and honour us willingly if they know that it comes from parents who love them unconditionally and have their best interests at heart.
Sermon Series: Dads for Life
敬虔的父母之道
箴言 22:6 教养孩童，使他走当行的道，就是到老他也不偏离。
如果我们查考圣经中不同的经文，就会发现神对父亲是有期待的。男人在家庭中的一个重要带领角色，就是要确保自己能善于管理家务。这也意味着要教导并引导儿女，使他们在言语和行为上都懂得尊重、举止端正（提摩太前书 3:3-5）。
儿女的管教、教导和培养，并不是仅仅落在教会主日学老师的责任上。最主要的责任在于父亲，他作为家庭属灵的头，要确保儿女被教导明白主的道路；而母亲则是在这事工上与父亲同工的伙伴。
首先，神并没有要我们把孩子训练成某种宗教信徒。因为如果只是充满仪式和律法主义的宗教，他/她们迟早会感到厌倦；而当他/她们长大以后，若与神的关系仅仅停留在宗教形式上，就容易被世界所吸引，偏离正道。基督信仰并不是一种宗教，而是与神之间真实的关系，这关系始于接受耶稣基督为个人的主和救主。其后，必须教导他/她们明白主日聚会的重要性——作为信徒群体一同敬拜神，聆听神的话语的传讲，并且把这事当作生命中的优先事项。
其次，我们需要为他/她们树立榜样，让他们明白独自花时间安静在神面前的重要性。在他/她们六岁之前，我们可以在睡前为他/她们读圣经来作榜样。当他/她们学会阅读之后，就可以请他/她们自己读儿童圣经里的经文。接下来，我们可以问他们想要为哪些事情祷告——例如朋友、同学、家人，或是他/她们自己。这样，我们就能教导他/她们如何祷告，并见证神垂听并回应他/她们的祈求。这会使他/她们学会信靠神，把忧虑交托给祂，因为祂顾念我们。随着时间的推移，这将发展成为他/她们与神的关系。当他/她们与神以及与父母之间建立起这样的亲密关系后，无论他/她们生命进入什么阶段，都愿意与父母分享，因为这已经成为他/她们生命中的一种生活方式。
第三，我们需要教导他们透过圣经来认识神，因为圣经是我们价值观的准则。随着他/她们渐渐长大，我们要进一步教导更深的基督信仰原则，特别是那些对信徒来说绝不可妥协、也是我们作为基督徒所坚持的根基。我们应当鼓励他/她们查考圣经，看看圣经如何论及学校里所教导的各种课题。这样也能帮助他/她们分辨圣经的教导与世俗所提倡的价值观之间的差异。
最后，我们必须记得，如果规矩没有建立在无条件的爱和有效沟通的根基之上，就会使孩子变得叛逆。唯有当孩子们明白，这些教导和要求出自父母无条件的爱，并且是真心为他/她们着想时，他/她们才会心甘情愿地聆听、顺服并尊敬父母。
讲章系列：为父之道
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