Sometimes conflict escalates quickly. A disagreement turns into a full-on fight. Bickering becomes screaming. An argument triggers a breakup. When emotions run high, intensity is inevitable. While you have seen this happen, I certainly hope you never experience escalation like young Joseph.
There was a secret going around that Joseph was his father’s favorite son. Dad was always quick to compliment and slow to correct his youngest boy. His brothers toiled away in the hot sun while Joseph could sit inside with an iced beverage. He didn’t really pull his weight around the farm, but that didn’t stop Jacob from marking his youngest son as his favorite. This subtle favoritism was made crystal clear when Jacob handed a gift to his son. “Jacob had a special gift made for Joseph—a beautiful robe” (Genesis 37:3).
After a peaceful and restful morning, Joseph tossed on his tie-dye cloak for a walk into the fields to visit his brothers. The jealous brothers saw him and his rainbow robe walking towards them on the horizon. Wiping sweat from his brow, one of them whispered, “Here comes that dreamer. Let’s kill him” (Genesis 37:20 MSG).
Wait, slow down. Are you telling me that a colorful coat turned these men into killers? Yes, but there is some important context. Clothes were famously boring and simple in this era. They were monochromatic and bland. Colored thread was reserved for royalty (2 Samuel 13:18). Weaving multiple colored threads together was lavish, luxurious, and a little unnecessary. The vibrant jacket sent a clear message to the rest of the family — “Joseph is my favorite. He will be King one day.” This made his brothers burn with envy.
In a vengeful frenzy, Joseph’s brothers ripped off the multicolored cloak, beat him up, and threw him into a pit to die. They didn’t want to risk their father finding the body, as they knew he’d spare no expense searching for his beloved son. Consequently, they hatched a plan worse than murder. They waved down a caravan and sold their little brother into slavery.
This is the tragedy of envy. It leads you to hurt people, but not just your target. An ancient Japanese proverb warns, “If you seek revenge, you should dig two graves.” In the process of hurting someone else, you will also hurt yourself. In this story, the loss of Joseph sends their family into a downward spiral. Jacob goes into a deep depression that causes the whole family to struggle just to get by. Has revenge ever made you want to hurt someone else? Know that you will be hurting yourself too.
Envy and resentment will suck the joy out of your own life. You will never enjoy your own life if you’re wishing you were living someone else’s.