Ecclesiastes 4:12 (NKJV) Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him. And a threefold cord is not quickly broken.
For believers, every marriage should have the vision and goal of growing closer to God. The three-strand cord represents God holding us strongly together as a married couple.
Agape love is the kind of love that will sustain the marriage because God is in the relationship. Agape love flows out of our heart, or spirit man, which has the nature of God. The nature of God is love—Agape love which is unconditional love. A marriage with God in it resembles a triangle where the couple is at the bottom of the triangle. Their love for each other will strengthen as they draw closer to God, who is at the Apex of the triangle.
God has to be part of the Christian marriage, and we are to love one another based on His love for us. As Christians, we take time to befriend each other with Phileo love. Agape love should be taught and practised in our daily living, and we climax with Eros love, which is our sensual expression.
A successful and fulfilling marriage does not just happen but requires both persons to work on it intentionally. So, what goals would you like to set for your marriage? These goals should be reasonable, realistic, attainable, and have a time limit. Some examples are:
- We will not hold grudges.
Ephesians 4:26-27 (NKJV) “Be angry, and do not sin”: do not let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil.
2. We will speak words that edify.
Romans 14:19 (NKJV) Therefore let us pursue the things which make for peace and the things by which one may edify another.
3. We will improve our sexual relationship.
1 Corinthians 7:3-6 (NKJV) Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise, the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. But I say this as a concession, not as a commandment.
4. We will pray for each other and pray together daily.
5. We will learn to be more flexible.
6. We will see things from the other’s perspective, giving ourselves two years to accomplish this.
7. We will work on trusting each other more.
Sermon Series: Before You Say I Do (Lesson 5 & 6)
为你的婚姻设定目标
传道书4:12 有人攻胜孤身一人，若有二人便能敌挡他；三股合成的绳子不容易折断。
对信徒来说，每一段婚姻都应该有一个异象和目标，那就是与神越来越亲密。三股绳代表 神将夫妻双方紧紧地连接在一起。
神无条件的爱是一种让婚姻关系持续下去的爱，因为 神在这个关系当中。无条件的爱从我们的心或具有上帝本性的灵人里涌流而出。神的本性就是爱—无条件的爱加倍之爱。在有 神的婚姻中，它就像一个三角形，而夫妻双方就在三角形的底部。当他们越亲近这位在三角形顶点的 神的时候，他们对彼此的爱会更坚固。
神必须成为基督徒婚姻的一部分，我们要站立在祂对我们的爱中彼此相爱。作为基督徒，我们花时间以友情(Phileo)之爱交朋友，又在我们的日常生活中被教导和实践 神无条件的爱，也以情爱，也就是感官之爱三者互相融合以达到顶点。
一段成功而充实的婚姻不是偶然发生的，而且需要双方有意为之努力而成的。那么你想为你的婚姻设定什么目标呢？这些目标应该合理、现实、可实现，并有时。例如：
- 我们不会记仇。
以弗所书 4:26-27 生气却不要犯罪，不可含怒到日落， 也不可给魔鬼留地步。
2. 我们会说彼此造就的话。
罗马书 14:19 所以，我们务要追求和睦的事与彼此建立德行的事。
3. 我们应该增进性爱关系。
哥林多前书 7:3-6 丈夫当用合宜之分待妻子，妻子待丈夫也要如此。 妻子没有权柄主张自己的身子，乃在丈夫；丈夫也没有权柄主张自己的身子，乃在妻子。 夫妻不可彼此亏负，除非两相情愿，暂时分房，为要专心祷告方可；以后仍要同房，免得撒旦趁着你们情不自禁，引诱你们。我说这话原是准你们的，不是命你们的。
4. 我们会为彼此祷告，并且每天一起祷告。
5. 我们会学会更加灵活有弹性。
6. 我们会从他人的角度来看待事情，给自己两年的时间来实现这一目标。
7. 我们将增进彼此的信任。
讲章系列：步向红毯之前(第五和第六课)
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